Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. —Henry Fielding

06 September 2013

Lots of Pain. As for the Gain...

The best thing I can say about Pain & Gain is that I still like its three stars after having watched their asinine movie.

This is a comedy, I guess. A crime/caper/comedy thing. In a lot of ways it is very similar to a movie like The Informant! (the Soderbergh film with Matt Damon) and especially I Love You Phillip Morris (that sort of gay prison/crime comedy with Jim Carrey).

The idea is kind of like a long-form narrative version of the Darwin Awards: let's watch these total idiots do something we can't believe the cops were stupid enough not to notice for so long. Bay's film is told in the most smug tone you can possibly imagine.

Whatever. I mean, who cares. Late in act two there is a ridiculous joke about a bathroom covered in feces and the entire audience I was with laughed. So apparently Pain & Gain is connecting with some people.

But this was not for me. As much as Dwayne Johnson is a hilarious performer and as much as I love Mark Wahlberg and Anthony Mackie.

Michael Bay. What the hell.

Also, anyone casting Ken Jeong in something is a jackass. The single joke at which he excels stopped being funny in 2009 at the latest.