Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. —Henry Fielding

05 May 2007

Questionnaire from Julie. I Must Be Bored.

1. You and Jesus go out to dinner - who pays?
Jesus. I've given that man a lot over the years. I figure he owes me one.

2. You suddenly have to flee the country and adopt a new name... what would it be?
Wow. I haven't thought about this before. It would be a name from a movie. I name everything after movies. Maybe Bill Holden.

3. Pick one state in the U.S. to get rid of permanently?
Texas. Peace out. They can obsess about themselves in their own country. They do anyway.

4. You wake up as the opposite gender. What's the one thing you wanna do?
I think I'd probably masturbate.

5. Luke Skywalker or Han Solo?
Han. I'm not into blondes.

6. Toy you always wanted but never got as a child?
I seriously can't remember. I always wanted more legos, but I think I always saved up and bought them...

7. If you were this question, what would you ask?
When is the last time someone took your breath away?

8. The last time you laughed until your stomach hurt:
With Ryan, Alison & Julie the last time we went to Brothers the Warehouse.

9. What is the last movie you saw that actually scared you?
Final Destination. Don't lie. That shit is scary. I also get scared every time I watch Apocalypse Now. I never expect that fucking tiger to jump out at me.

10. Stupidest thing you've ever said out loud?
The list is pretty long. I can't remember. I say stupid shit all the time.

11. You're sentenced to death and it’s the morning of your execution: what do you want to eat?
Gin.

12. What's something that most people do that you've never done?
I've never been to New York and I have no excuse.

13. Before you die you want to go to...?
Back to Europe.

14. What’s the last thing you ate?
I drank a glass of juice. I'm turning into Shelby from Steel Magnolias

15. A wild animal you'd like to have as a pet?
A fucking wolf. That would be awesome.

16. A drug you'll never try?
N/A

17. If you were an animal, what would you be?
A bird. Maybe a goose or an owl.

18. If you had to marry someone you knew at the age of 12, who would it have been?
Oh my. That was what? The seventh grade? I think my closest friend was Michael Rodarte (I wonder if he's gay now. Probably.)

19. What's something a lot of people don't know about you?
I used to know how to play the piano. But now I don't.

20. First celebrity crush?
Matlock. And Hercule Poirot. Crimefighters are hot.

21. What's a weapon to suit your personality, habits and abilities?
Just give me a cigarette and let me burn people.

22. Best flavor of runts?
The red one.

23. Favorite breakfast bread style (pancakes, waffles, toast etc...)
Coffee cake. Yum. But I won't eat it. People with body dysmorphia don't eat things like that.

24. Favorite movie?
Network. Have you seen it? If you haven't you're missing out.

25. Worst way to die?
There aren't any that are good. But I don't want to die quickly, that's all I know.

26. Grossest injury you've ever seen?
When I cut the end of my middle finger off on Christmas Eve 2005. That was hot.

27. The worst injury you've ever had?
Nothing that bad. Except when my mother ran over my foot with the family car.

28. Favorite thing about Thanksgiving?
This quiz asks a lot of questions about food. I think this questionnaire has body dysmorphia. My favorite thing about Thanksgiving is stuffing. And gravy. I am all about gravy.

29. Sport you hate the most?
Basketball. I know the men are half-clothed and all that, but it's so boring.

30. What state in the US do you want to visit?
New York. It's time I went.

31. What's something you think would be sweet to know everything about?
Mandarin Chinese. I wish I spoke it.

32. Favorite Actor/Actress?
Lately, I'm all about Meryl Streep. My new favorite actor is Neil Patrick Harris.

33. What's one phrase you absolutely detest?
"I don't think the character would do that."

34. What makes an awesome party?
Prince.

35. What's your favorite material possession?
My books.

36. What's something that most consider an insult but you enjoy having said about you?
Does being called gay count?

37. Favorite kind of dog(s)?
Beagles. God help me those things are cute.

38. Favorite carnival food?
What is this? I have no idea.

39. Morning or night person?
Night. Mornings are for people who went to bed early.

41. Weirdest Ebay purchase?
I've never done this.

43. Its Saturday at 3am. Where are you?
Writing a paper, usually.

44. Who's your favorite friend/friends to go out with?
My boyfriend.

45. Worst job you've ever had?
I dug weeds for one day for a property manager when I was fifteen. Never again.

46. What's something your friends make fun of you for?
Being a snob is a frequent jab. And they're usually right.

47. Favorite cereal?
Golden Grahams.

48. Book you could read repeatedly?
Michael Cunningham's Flesh & Blood and Lewis Thomas's The Lives of a Cell.

49. What's the meanest thing you've ever done?
I do inappropriately unkind things all the time. Is there a scale? I sometimes tell a story of something really mean that I did after my girlfriend in high school and I broke up, but I don't want to repeat it here. It was really mean.

50. If you were drafted into a war, would you survive?
I sure as Hell would.