Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea. —Henry Fielding

20 June 2004

Red Right (Wing) Hand

Yesterday, after sleeping in and then watching Luis Buñuel's The Discreet Charm of the Bourgeoisie, I headed out to Diamond Bar to meet Jaime for sushi. 

I don't understand Buñuel's films.  If anyone would care to explain them to me I would be immensely grateful.

Jaime and I had our sushi and then we went to Borders to purchase some reading material.  Jaime and I have such fun.  She bought the newest issue of Bust and Augusten Burroughs's Running with Scissors.  I had decided I wanted to buy Sylvia Plath's Ariel, and after reading the jacket, I also decided to get Augusten Burroughs's Dry.  We promised that after reading the Burroughs books we would trade.  (I don't give a hoot about Bust and she's read Ariel.)

Today I went out to my parents' house for Father's Day.  I brought coffee with me.  Today my parents exhausted me.  I think it's really my brother and sister who make me the most tired.  My brother is more politically ignorant than I think is humanly possible.  How can anyone be that ignorant?!  I have a family full of far-right conservatives.  Now, I am not a far-left liberal (no matter what the quiz says), but when my family and I talk politics I am bound to get a little incensed/depressed/exasperated.  They are just so... retarded. 

I'll explain why I've decided to vote for John Kerry a little later in the week.

Sometimes I can handle Michael.  Sometimes he's funny.  Sometimes he amuses me.  Sometimes he's clever.  Today he just rubbed me the wrong way.  We have these conversations that center around whether I would be a liberal if I were straight or whether I would still be an atheist if I were straight.

Would I still be an ateist if I weren't a gay man?  Would I still be an artist if I weren't a gay man?  Would I still be a liberal if I weren't a gay man?  These questions are actually unacceptable to me.  They have no basis in reality.  Because the answer is: "I would be a gay man.  I would be a liberal and an artist and an atheist and a gay man.  No matter what."  And then I start to actually consider the question... I would fit in with this family so much better if I weren't a gay man and if I weren't a liberal and if I weren't an atheist and—dare I say it—if I weren't an artist.  It would all be so much easier for them.  But I would still be all of those things, gay or straight.  I know I would.  It is a silly question, but I know the answer.  Sex is sex.  I'm not having any sex right now.  I can identify myself however I please: I can tell everyone I'm a straight male if I want, right?  As a matter of fact, I can have sex with Brittney whenever I please, and probably half-a-dozen other women too.  I could go do that, and then I can call myself a straight man. 

I am still an atheist and a liberal and an artist.  And the question is a stupid, silly question without a purpose.  Because I am a gay man and I don't plan on having any sex with any women.  (Though Allan and Brittney reminded me on Saturday that I did make out with Drea a little less than 2 years ago.  Hee hee.  Such stupidity.)

I'm tired.

I just finished listening to an interview with Lynne Truss of Eats, Shoots & Leaves fame.  My dad recorded it on cable for me.  Isn't that sweet?  He's a weird-o Bill O'Reilly fan, but he still knows how to be nice.